Vitality

Science Says To Look For These In A Happy Marriage

When looking for a potential partner, one that we plan on eventually marrying and spending the rest of our lives with, people often look for qualities that would make the person compatible with them. Oftentimes, these qualities include finding someone who is intelligent and easy to get along with, someone who has chemistry as you or someone who enjoys the same interests as you. And while all those things are good points, and while finding someone who ticks all of the boxes is essentially a good match, science defines two things that we really need for longevity but it doesn’t include any of what’s mentioned above.

That’s right. As according to various studies made, the two things that people should look for when they want longevity with a partner is not chemistry, same interests or even intelligence but self-control and conscientiousness. And while these two things may not sound like the most romantic or sexy thing in the world, science has consistently stated that these two things can do a lot for romance. How?

It’s quite simple, really. According to psychologist Jeremy Nicholson, partners of individuals who are high in self-control are more likely to trust their partners more.

"Apparently, those with better ability to control themselves can resist temptation--even the temptation to stray when someone cute is flirting with them," Nicholson, highlighting how people who want a faithful partner should look for someone with good self-control, said.

Second is conscientiousness, which means that your partner is more likely to make the effort to work things out whenever conflict arises, something that every long-lasting relationship has.

Per Nicholson, people who exhibit these two traits are also more likely to keep the promises they make, which is something that everyone expects from a romantic partner.

"Apparently, people don't keep promises because they 'love' you; they do it because they have the self-control to complete the task they promised,” Nicholson said.

But how exactly do you find someone like this? Per Nicholson, it’s best to look for it in their attention spans and how much they listen to you. Turns out, science can be a good marriage counselor.

Marriage Men are more likely than women to reap the health benefits of a good marriage, but are also more likely to experience adverse health effects of a bad one. Brooke Cagle/Unsplash

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