Meaghan Ramsey, the global director of the Dove self-esteem project and general self-esteem advocate, wants you to start kissing the mirror again. You know, the way you would when you were younger and knew nothing of Photoshop, of size zero jeans, and models — let alone how often each of these might prompt you to ask, “Am I ugly?”

You definitely didn't know how dangerous a simple question like that could be either. The very subject of her recent TED Talk, Ramsey outlined how strongly poor body image and self-esteem is tied to a person’s relationships, academic, and career settings. She cited research that found six out of 10 girls opt out of something if they don’t believe they look good enough, while nearly one in three teenagers won’t participate in class so as not to draw attention to their looks.

"When it comes to exams, if you don't think you look good enough, specifically if you don't think you are thin enough, you will score a lower grade point average than your peers who are not concerned with this," Ramsey said. "And this is consistent across Finland, the U.S., and China, and is true regardless of how much you actually weigh. So to be super clear, we're talking about the way you think you look, not how you actually look.”

The truly sad thing is, there’s no short supply of science to concede these statistics, especially among teens. Body image issues in middle school only worsen as we get older, Facebook is capable of inspiring an eating disorder, and being dissatisfied with yourself leaves you dissatisfied with so many other aspects of your life. And for what? This obsession with a perfect body image, Ramsey added, isn’t the truth. How a person looks isn’t the single best part of their identity; in fact, it’s only one, small part of who they are. Just in case it's not clear, that person is not ugly and is worthy of so much more than you might have been led to believe.

Watch her full talk in the video below, and use the hashtag #kissthemirror to help change the body image conversation.